A few months ago, the random question "I wonder if my blog has been bad for my writing" ran through my head.
I'd started blogging several years ago as an answer to journaling. I've never been very good at keeping a journal… I tend to start them under duress ("you're a writer, you're supposed to keep a journal!"), continue plugging away at them for a short while (usually measured in weeks… occasionally ramping up to a month or two) and then abandoning the whole thing as just too much trouble. Whether vanity, or the same feeling that leaves me unlikely to cook dinner if I'm the only one that's going to be eating it, I tend to find keeping a journal a tedious exercise — if I'm the only one that's ever going to read the thing, and it's unlikely I ever WILL, then what's the point?!?
Blogging seemed to make sense as an alternative to journaling, as it provides a place to go and write about whatever's on your mind, but has a public aspect that at least allows me to fool myself into thinking that I'm not just writing for myself. I am not kidding myself into thinking that my "audience" is anything more than the few friends and relatives I've pestered enough to get them to read my b.s.… but the rationalization remains.
But, as I said, I started questioning the value of this experiment back in the fall. I'd started blogging in 2003 (and was pretty prolific that first year, judging by the number of posts), slowing down slightly in following years, then taking a real nose-dive in posts in 2009 (barely nudging past twice a month).
But, perhaps not coincidentally, I realized that, while I've been blogging regularly for the past several years, my non-blogging writing has been nearly non-existent. I have the obligatory screenplay draft mildewing on the shelf above my computer (what writer in LA doesn't have at least one of those lying around, after all), several short stories in various phases of completion, and one dreadfully overwrought novel mouldering in a box somewhere… and none of them had seen the light of day in years.
Not that I didn't have reasons (or excuses) for my lack of productivity. The screenplay, for instance, had just gone through a major revision, and I'd taken a truly enlightening workshop on screenwriting, just before we bought our house. Needless to say, moving into a new home, and all the concomitant chores, projects and "adventures" that come with home-ownership kept me busier than normal for at least the first year in the house. And that enlightening workshop I'd taken gave me so much food for thought in regards to rewriting that screenplay that I knew I had to dedicate serious thought to it, and be ready to devote some serious time to that rewrite… a combination of requirements guaranteed to bring out the worst of my procrastinary tendencies. But that was more than 5 years ago, so it can be reasonably assumed I've exhausted that particular "justification."
Then there's acting, which tends to flex the same creative muscles as writing and is, perhaps, more demanding in regards to time (with rehearsals and performances and other people's time to take into consideration). I also find it somewhat easier to lose myself in than writing. So each time I get back into acting (as I did briefly a couple of years ago) I tend to spend less time writing.
But all of this is just so much noise, I realized. I've been writing regularly for years now, it's just all been on my blog. Hence my questioning whether the blog has been bad for my writing.
So… here it is, several months later, and I've found that I've posted precisely 6 times since August 2009 (when I posted 6 times in a single month)… and I haven't sat down once to do any writing anywhere else. I haven't pulled out my screenplay, or called up any of my short stories, or even gone digging for that old, mouldering novel. I've not had one bright new idea that's come to light, urging me to start a new project, nor have I discovered any deep-seated need to start anything new.
What I have found myself thinking about are items to write about on my blog (but haven't been willing to post until I work my way through this internal debate). And I've had the recurring notion that I try working on one of those novels/screenplays/short stories via a blog… an incredibly daring idea for me, as I'm the type that's reluctant to share any kind of work-in-progress. But the more I play with that idea, the more intriguing it becomes.
So this lengthy internal debate (sadly, blogging has not taught me anything about brevity) has brought me back around full circle. I'm going to keep blogging, as I enjoy the indulgence (after all, where else can I get away with rambling on about anything from my writing process, to movies, or politics or the latest absurdity I've encountered, all in the course of a few paragraphs). Meanwhile, if I'm concerned about writing as anything more than a hobby, well it's time I apply myself to it once again, and stop making excuses and blaming inanimate tools for my lack of productivity.
I'd started blogging several years ago as an answer to journaling. I've never been very good at keeping a journal… I tend to start them under duress ("you're a writer, you're supposed to keep a journal!"), continue plugging away at them for a short while (usually measured in weeks… occasionally ramping up to a month or two) and then abandoning the whole thing as just too much trouble. Whether vanity, or the same feeling that leaves me unlikely to cook dinner if I'm the only one that's going to be eating it, I tend to find keeping a journal a tedious exercise — if I'm the only one that's ever going to read the thing, and it's unlikely I ever WILL, then what's the point?!?
Blogging seemed to make sense as an alternative to journaling, as it provides a place to go and write about whatever's on your mind, but has a public aspect that at least allows me to fool myself into thinking that I'm not just writing for myself. I am not kidding myself into thinking that my "audience" is anything more than the few friends and relatives I've pestered enough to get them to read my b.s.… but the rationalization remains.
But, as I said, I started questioning the value of this experiment back in the fall. I'd started blogging in 2003 (and was pretty prolific that first year, judging by the number of posts), slowing down slightly in following years, then taking a real nose-dive in posts in 2009 (barely nudging past twice a month).
But, perhaps not coincidentally, I realized that, while I've been blogging regularly for the past several years, my non-blogging writing has been nearly non-existent. I have the obligatory screenplay draft mildewing on the shelf above my computer (what writer in LA doesn't have at least one of those lying around, after all), several short stories in various phases of completion, and one dreadfully overwrought novel mouldering in a box somewhere… and none of them had seen the light of day in years.
Not that I didn't have reasons (or excuses) for my lack of productivity. The screenplay, for instance, had just gone through a major revision, and I'd taken a truly enlightening workshop on screenwriting, just before we bought our house. Needless to say, moving into a new home, and all the concomitant chores, projects and "adventures" that come with home-ownership kept me busier than normal for at least the first year in the house. And that enlightening workshop I'd taken gave me so much food for thought in regards to rewriting that screenplay that I knew I had to dedicate serious thought to it, and be ready to devote some serious time to that rewrite… a combination of requirements guaranteed to bring out the worst of my procrastinary tendencies. But that was more than 5 years ago, so it can be reasonably assumed I've exhausted that particular "justification."
Then there's acting, which tends to flex the same creative muscles as writing and is, perhaps, more demanding in regards to time (with rehearsals and performances and other people's time to take into consideration). I also find it somewhat easier to lose myself in than writing. So each time I get back into acting (as I did briefly a couple of years ago) I tend to spend less time writing.
But all of this is just so much noise, I realized. I've been writing regularly for years now, it's just all been on my blog. Hence my questioning whether the blog has been bad for my writing.
So… here it is, several months later, and I've found that I've posted precisely 6 times since August 2009 (when I posted 6 times in a single month)… and I haven't sat down once to do any writing anywhere else. I haven't pulled out my screenplay, or called up any of my short stories, or even gone digging for that old, mouldering novel. I've not had one bright new idea that's come to light, urging me to start a new project, nor have I discovered any deep-seated need to start anything new.
What I have found myself thinking about are items to write about on my blog (but haven't been willing to post until I work my way through this internal debate). And I've had the recurring notion that I try working on one of those novels/screenplays/short stories via a blog… an incredibly daring idea for me, as I'm the type that's reluctant to share any kind of work-in-progress. But the more I play with that idea, the more intriguing it becomes.
So this lengthy internal debate (sadly, blogging has not taught me anything about brevity) has brought me back around full circle. I'm going to keep blogging, as I enjoy the indulgence (after all, where else can I get away with rambling on about anything from my writing process, to movies, or politics or the latest absurdity I've encountered, all in the course of a few paragraphs). Meanwhile, if I'm concerned about writing as anything more than a hobby, well it's time I apply myself to it once again, and stop making excuses and blaming inanimate tools for my lack of productivity.
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