A kind of obvious title for any post talking about a Michael Bay film, but let me reiterate… Transformers is one big, dumb, loud movie. With a healthy emphasis on dumb.
I guess I should acknowledge that I've never been a Transformers fan. They came along too late for my childhood cartoon watching, and too early for my adult appreciation of all things animated, so they got lumped into that "my god, another cartoon designed to shill toys" category. And it's never really left that category for me.
So my excitement level over this would have been hard to find, let alone measure. Suffice it to say, I had an afternoon to kill, I'd heard it was a fun time at the movies and I figured, if I'm GOING to watch the damn thing, I'd better do it in a theatre where I can get the full effect of all those exploding robots.
I'm going to opine, first off, that the "fun time at the movies" comment is really one of those "all a matter of taste" moments. (One of the DJs on KROQ this morning said it's one of their Top 10 All Time Best movies. My head nearly exploded.) I can't say I was bored throughout… there was probably far too much "stuff" going on to really be bored. On the other hand, I found, pretty rapidly, that I just didn't care about most of it.
Sure, the robots are big and loud and they look really cool when the transform from their terrestrial disguises into their giant robot form. But that's a fleeting moment of cool and, surprisingly, under-utilized I think. By that I mean, it took far longer to actually GET to the robots than I would have expected (especially for Michael Bay) and little time was spent on said robots, outside of the time they spent trying to blow each other up.
This I find really puzzling. You've got a movie called Transformers. It's about robots that transform into cars and trucks and such to disguise themselves between battles. And yet it takes you nearly half the movie before you see your first robot transform (aside from fleeting glances and the obligatory James Bondian introductory set piece). The main villain, the evil Decepticon Megatron spends the majority of the movie off-screen, or frozen solid. It's probably the smallest amount of screen time for a villain since Bond's Blofeld spent most of his time being talked about and never seen. What, did they think we cared about the human story in this big robot movie? (If so, they're sadly mistaken.) The other Decepticons get similar short shrift, while the virtuous Autobots get one brief scene where we get to see how "cool" they are (my inner voice of sanity had trouble with the painfully unhip 'hip' dialogue choices, but it was a gibbering mess by then anyway) and then they're only seen in glimpses as they fly around, pose, shoot and beat each other up.
(In a recent Entertainment Weekly article, I love how Bay talks about licensing GM vehicles for this movie. He points out that licensing the cars saved him $3 million of his budget, and says something along the lines of "this isn't selling out, it's good business." I know I complained about this same licensing a couple of years ago, but I think now he's right. Selling out implies some kind of artistic sense that's betrayed by the introduction of commerce into the discussion. Transformers is not art. It's a summertime entertainment, designed to sell movie tickets, popcorn and toys. There's nothing there to sell out. And hey, at least we get a look at the new Camaro concept car and the Pontiac Solstice, so we get some cool cars out of the deal.)
I guess now might be the time to mention SPOILER ALERT!!!! Not that I'm giving away specific details here, but I am talking about the end of the movie. Just in case you still care, you know?
Another thing I noticed, and one which shouldn't surprise anyone, is the videogame feel of the movie. As I was watching it, I realized it wasn't simply the preponderance of CGI… that's kind of what you expect, after all. And there are lots of movies coming out now that rely heavily on CGI and yet manage not to end up feeling like you're watching a videogame. But what's obvious here is the difference between the way you tell a story in a videogame and the way you tell that story in a movie, and the internal logic that guides those choices. (I know, mentioning the word logic in association with this movie is going out on a limb, but bear with me.)
As I watched the robots pummelling each other in their climactic city-wide battle, as Shia ran to climb to the top of the building he needed to reach to deliver the device the robots were fighting over, it occurred to me that this makes PERFECT sense in a videogame. You need to have your character leave Hoover dam to make a cross-country schlep, all the while dodging Decepticon attacks, so he can get to a downtown location nowhere near the building he has to reach, only to fight his way through masses of exploding cars, robots and other expendable things, just so he can have victory ripped from his hands within moments of grasping it. This makes complete sense in a game because you're the guy controlling the character in the game, and you get a feeling of satisfaction every time you accomplish one of your character's goals.
In a movie, watching all this take place, you're left with a vague sense of "why?" and a disconnect from the experience. I mean, why does he need to race cross country to deliver the Autospark (or whatever it's called)? Why couldn't they have gotten closer to the building he needs to run up? And hasn't anybody realized that, considering the damn robots are armed to the teeth and can FLY, that all they have to do is wait for him to get on the helicopter, follow it out a few miles from town, blast it out of the sky and pick up the piece they're looking for! (Of course, at this point we must acknowledge that strategy is not the Decepticon's strong suit, since this didn't occur to them either).
The arbitrary nature of this "plan" simply defies any logic, and virtually screamed "we don't care how we got here… we just wanted to blow some shit up!". To pick out another of this year's big, loud action movies, the climactic chase scene in Live Free or Die Hard is gleefully, unabashedly, absurdly over the top. Your disbelief needs industrial strength suspension to go along for this ride. (And let's not even go into how McClane catches up to the bad guys after the resolution of this scene.) But even while you sit in the middle of this orgy of excess, fully recognizing it as such as it's happening, you're still caught up by the internal logic of the movie and this moment seems somehow, not simply right, but inevitable.*
Transformers doesn't care about this. They've already got your ten bucks, they've taken you along for the ride this long, and they've got stuff to blow up, damnit! So they know you'll sit through just about anything and like it. And if you're sitting there by this time, debating plot points and wondering about motivations and actions, well you're just in the wrong movie.
I think I was in the wrong movie.
I guess I should acknowledge that I've never been a Transformers fan. They came along too late for my childhood cartoon watching, and too early for my adult appreciation of all things animated, so they got lumped into that "my god, another cartoon designed to shill toys" category. And it's never really left that category for me.
So my excitement level over this would have been hard to find, let alone measure. Suffice it to say, I had an afternoon to kill, I'd heard it was a fun time at the movies and I figured, if I'm GOING to watch the damn thing, I'd better do it in a theatre where I can get the full effect of all those exploding robots.
I'm going to opine, first off, that the "fun time at the movies" comment is really one of those "all a matter of taste" moments. (One of the DJs on KROQ this morning said it's one of their Top 10 All Time Best movies. My head nearly exploded.) I can't say I was bored throughout… there was probably far too much "stuff" going on to really be bored. On the other hand, I found, pretty rapidly, that I just didn't care about most of it.
Sure, the robots are big and loud and they look really cool when the transform from their terrestrial disguises into their giant robot form. But that's a fleeting moment of cool and, surprisingly, under-utilized I think. By that I mean, it took far longer to actually GET to the robots than I would have expected (especially for Michael Bay) and little time was spent on said robots, outside of the time they spent trying to blow each other up.
This I find really puzzling. You've got a movie called Transformers. It's about robots that transform into cars and trucks and such to disguise themselves between battles. And yet it takes you nearly half the movie before you see your first robot transform (aside from fleeting glances and the obligatory James Bondian introductory set piece). The main villain, the evil Decepticon Megatron spends the majority of the movie off-screen, or frozen solid. It's probably the smallest amount of screen time for a villain since Bond's Blofeld spent most of his time being talked about and never seen. What, did they think we cared about the human story in this big robot movie? (If so, they're sadly mistaken.) The other Decepticons get similar short shrift, while the virtuous Autobots get one brief scene where we get to see how "cool" they are (my inner voice of sanity had trouble with the painfully unhip 'hip' dialogue choices, but it was a gibbering mess by then anyway) and then they're only seen in glimpses as they fly around, pose, shoot and beat each other up.
(In a recent Entertainment Weekly article, I love how Bay talks about licensing GM vehicles for this movie. He points out that licensing the cars saved him $3 million of his budget, and says something along the lines of "this isn't selling out, it's good business." I know I complained about this same licensing a couple of years ago, but I think now he's right. Selling out implies some kind of artistic sense that's betrayed by the introduction of commerce into the discussion. Transformers is not art. It's a summertime entertainment, designed to sell movie tickets, popcorn and toys. There's nothing there to sell out. And hey, at least we get a look at the new Camaro concept car and the Pontiac Solstice, so we get some cool cars out of the deal.)
I guess now might be the time to mention SPOILER ALERT!!!! Not that I'm giving away specific details here, but I am talking about the end of the movie. Just in case you still care, you know?
Another thing I noticed, and one which shouldn't surprise anyone, is the videogame feel of the movie. As I was watching it, I realized it wasn't simply the preponderance of CGI… that's kind of what you expect, after all. And there are lots of movies coming out now that rely heavily on CGI and yet manage not to end up feeling like you're watching a videogame. But what's obvious here is the difference between the way you tell a story in a videogame and the way you tell that story in a movie, and the internal logic that guides those choices. (I know, mentioning the word logic in association with this movie is going out on a limb, but bear with me.)
As I watched the robots pummelling each other in their climactic city-wide battle, as Shia ran to climb to the top of the building he needed to reach to deliver the device the robots were fighting over, it occurred to me that this makes PERFECT sense in a videogame. You need to have your character leave Hoover dam to make a cross-country schlep, all the while dodging Decepticon attacks, so he can get to a downtown location nowhere near the building he has to reach, only to fight his way through masses of exploding cars, robots and other expendable things, just so he can have victory ripped from his hands within moments of grasping it. This makes complete sense in a game because you're the guy controlling the character in the game, and you get a feeling of satisfaction every time you accomplish one of your character's goals.
In a movie, watching all this take place, you're left with a vague sense of "why?" and a disconnect from the experience. I mean, why does he need to race cross country to deliver the Autospark (or whatever it's called)? Why couldn't they have gotten closer to the building he needs to run up? And hasn't anybody realized that, considering the damn robots are armed to the teeth and can FLY, that all they have to do is wait for him to get on the helicopter, follow it out a few miles from town, blast it out of the sky and pick up the piece they're looking for! (Of course, at this point we must acknowledge that strategy is not the Decepticon's strong suit, since this didn't occur to them either).
The arbitrary nature of this "plan" simply defies any logic, and virtually screamed "we don't care how we got here… we just wanted to blow some shit up!". To pick out another of this year's big, loud action movies, the climactic chase scene in Live Free or Die Hard is gleefully, unabashedly, absurdly over the top. Your disbelief needs industrial strength suspension to go along for this ride. (And let's not even go into how McClane catches up to the bad guys after the resolution of this scene.) But even while you sit in the middle of this orgy of excess, fully recognizing it as such as it's happening, you're still caught up by the internal logic of the movie and this moment seems somehow, not simply right, but inevitable.*
Transformers doesn't care about this. They've already got your ten bucks, they've taken you along for the ride this long, and they've got stuff to blow up, damnit! So they know you'll sit through just about anything and like it. And if you're sitting there by this time, debating plot points and wondering about motivations and actions, well you're just in the wrong movie.
I think I was in the wrong movie.
*A note 'from the future'. Having just watched this latest Die Hard again on DVD (it's January '08 now), I have to say that "not simply right but inevitable" must have been me caught up in post-good movie excitement. I have come to completely reject the ridiculous big-rig/jump-jet chase scene as too completely illogical and contrary to any reality I'm willing to embrace to let it slide. And the thought that it was completely unnecessary and served only to say "we had a huge effects budget and had to find some way to justify it" doesn't help. So no, I'm not buying the chase scene any more. Still like the movie a lot, but it's despite the finale, not because of it.
Comments
Ok...first of all, I'll admit I liked the movie. A lot. I'll get to my reasons why in a sec, but I want to address some of your issues first:
It sort of sounds like you were prepped for your typical dumb, blow-'em-up-good, Bay movies, and the first half had you so perplexed that when it got to the blow-'em-up, you were pissed. :D
Yes, it is surprising that a Bay movie spent that much time developing character and relationships between a kid, a girl, and his...ummmm...car. BUT, that's one of the biggest pluses of the film. At it's heart (a Bay movie with a heart!), it's about a boy and his first car. I liked the setup stuff a lot...and, I'll admit Shia has a lot to do with it. That said, it steals heavily from E.T., and when the first car/Transformer chase begins it's stealing heavily from T2.
As for the run up to the building 'plan' - it ISN'T a plan. It was never the goal to begin with. They run from the dam to the city to A) get away from the bad robots chasing them, and b) get to their military help/backup. Why isn't there more military help/backup at the dam? I dunno. You got me there. But, once they get to the city, the bad robots have caught up, and they're making a stand and improvising. "Run to the top of the building" is not a plan...it's a last second try to escape move hoping they can get the allspark out of the city (now that they're trapped there). It is a stupid idea, because the robots fly...but, hey, they're under pressure.
Now, on to some areas where I agree with you:
The aforementioned non-originality is annoying. Add to it the clear rip-off of ID4 (Sector 7 and the frozen Megatron…bleh), and you’ve got a script with nary an original idea.
The entire subplot with Rachel, the hot Aussie computer geek (LOL!!) is a waste of time. NOTHING comes out of it. I prefer focusing on the Delta Force team, the kid, and the robots. It would also save us from some bad comedy via Anthony Andersen.
Which means…I agree that there should have been more robot characterization and depth. Make us care more! Same with Shia (though, he is ok), and the soldiers. The hilarious attempt to make us care about the Captain because of his cliché baby at home is utterly unforgivable.
Lastly, what was John Turturro doing? You’re an actor…can you elucidate?
But, the rest of the movie is a hoot, and the action is really, REALLY good. There is, amazingly, NOT a preponderance of CGI here. The movie cost HALF what Spidey and/or Pirates cost and is ten times more visually exciting. Why? Because Bay blows real shit up and is the best in the biz at doing it. Only the robots and the occasional jet are CGI. The humor was also a kick to me. I was giggling a lot.
Having seen it a second time with a Q&A with Bay and the writers, I can attest that the reason we didn’t get more characterization of the robots is that the studio did not want it. Bay and the writers had to scratch and claw for every bit of robot dialogue and time you DID see. The studio actually wanted non-talking robots. Of course, that wouldn’t even be The Transformers, but we’re talking about studio heads here.
I also believe the reason the hot Aussie was not cut is because she was originally the love interest and the brunette was added in development. Again, I don’t know how this evolved, but better to cut the Aussie altogether or don’t add the brunette.
I do have to admit I found myself in the unusual position of complaining about a movie that actually took its time getting to the explosions, but it all seemed so half-hearted to me. It's not helped by Bay's dependence on stereotypical, 2D characters. He's firmly in disaster movie mode here, with a large cast of disparate characters that you know will all end up together by the end of the film to fight off the alien menace (ID4, as you mention — not that THAT one was original!) I kept getting distracted from the, arguably, decent boy and a girl and his car story by the other attempts at character. Agreed, the Aussie girl's storyline seems a waste of time, and anything with Anthony Andrews is, almost by definition, something I don't want to see. The Delta Force guys had their moments, but if they're going to take charge, then they definitely should have had more time to develop their importance.
But ultimately, I think you're right… I expected a movie where the robots were important characters. I've been hearing for months about the original series and the first movie and how kids were devastated by the death of Optimus Prime in that movie, so I was expecting to see something I could care about. The fact that the studio suits were fighting that all along hardly surprises me. (Cliché as it sounds, "imagination" and "creativity" certainly don't seem to be necessary survival skills in studio management. I wonder how they can be that completely clueless about the property they're so sold on, but it doesn't surprise me.)
I'll grant you the action is good. It IS what Bay excels at. Maybe the escape from Hoover dam wasn't supposed to be a plan, but I wanted the filmmakers to have a plan. I just found it all so pointless... they haven't made me care about any of these robots yet (even Bumblebee, who you're obviously supposed to care about) so why should I start now?
Obviously, I was not predisposed to like the movie, so it's probably just a case of it living down to my expectations.